I just had an awesome visit with my sister, Andrea!!! It left me feeling way more positive and up beat than I have been feeling for a while. I feel more confident in my mothering skills. Reflecting on it, I'm doing a pretty good job with my boy, I mean I play with him and read to him and say prayers with him. I try to feed him good food, and I sing to him and tell him I love him, so just cause I have some weaknesses doesn't mean I'm not a good mommy! As long as I try my hardest, right? I've also been feeling really stupid because I'm not in school right now and sometimes didn't do so great when I was in school, but, just because I'm not continuing my education right now, doesn't mean I can't do it at some point! It's never too late! I'm thinking about going to the skin institute down here, it's expensive, but when I help people like that I feel really good about myself! Like, I gave my mom a pedicure and waxed her eyebrows when I was up there, and I loved doing it!
I love feeling hopeful. Besides being inspired by eachother we had a way fun time this weekend! We laughed so much, and I felt like my old self! We watched New Moon and mostly made fun of it- we gave the characters weird voices and made up our own dialogue (Bella was a valley girl, Edward was a creepy old british man, and Jacob was a surfer) it was really late at night, so it seemed really REALLY funny to us! Good times! We also got some really funny pics (mostly on her camera- boo!) One of them is of K.J. looking like he was doing the sprinkler dance, it's hilarious!
So, in conclusion I'm really happy right now! Hooray!
Side note: I love Krista and Phil!!!! CONGRATULATIONS!!!! I am so freakin happy for you guys!
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My name is Cynda, and I'm here to say that I'm the baddest rapper in the U.S.A. Other than that, I live in St. George, Utah with my husband, Kualii, and the rest of my in laws!!!I am pregnant with our first baby and am so excited. I can't wait to meet him (or her)! That's about it!
2 comments:
"Children will not remember you for the material things you provided, but for the feeling that you loved them" Richard L Evans.
Cynda! I'm gonna get forceful with you here! STOP WITH THE MOMMY GUILT!!! Holy crap KJ is the LUCKIEST baby in the entire world! Why? Because he CONSTANTLY feels his mommy's love. Whether he has his own bed or you spoil him too much as long as you set loving boundaries and give him LOTS of love, you're the best mom in the whole world! Did you know that every time you show love and affection to your child especially with hugging and cuddling it releases a chemical in their brain? Drug addicts usually come from families where they didn't receieve love and affection and they seek drugs to get that same feeling! So ALL you have to do is be a loving parent! At this point KJ is too young to rule the house so there is absolutely nothing you could have done wrong this far anyway! Just read that book and you'll be set for life! You're the best mommy in the world and stop listening to your stupid in-laws that have NO CLUE what they are talking about!!!!!!
Thank you so much, Krista!! I'm feeling it now, I feel so much better about my mommy skills now! Sometimes I have moments where I feel down about things, but this is not one of those moments, so I'm gonna enjoy it! And really my guilt is selfish too, because I think to myself, wouldn't things be easier for me if Kj would sleep in his own bed, or sleep through the night, or decide to like food or milk? So it's not all hoping I do a good job for him (that's some of it too) but I feel like I'm doing my best, and he was given to me for a reason, because I have the potential to take care of him the very best, better than anybody (including some people's stupid grandmas. I'm feeling awesome, and I will definitely stop the pointless guilt! Thank you for loving me, I love you too!
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